The Nerd and I; the selves we create
Has anyone else been hesitant to share some of your interests for fear of judgement? Or just assumed that others won’t be interested in the things you’re into? Or is this something everyone else moved past back in high school? I have, so it’s time to get your nerd on because I wanted to talk about role playing games (from here on referred to as RPGs) and table top gaming today!
I’ve been a long-time fan and participant of RPGs and miniature games, starting at the age of around eight or nine when my older brother introduced me to Dungeons & Dragons. When I hit high-school I stepped into miniature gaming with a mate who still keeps me honest on the hobby front. While I’ve been light on miniature gaming of late, RPG sessions are still going strong, mostly online and led mainly by my younger brother these days.
However, many who know me will have little idea about my interest in this space. That’s not due to any short-comings on their part, but rather a habit of not talking about it on mine, and I’ve been wondering lately why that is? I think that, while I have always loved playing these games, I’ve also been aware of the nerd tag that tends to come along with them, and so early on I got into the habit of separating it from other areas of my life, only talking about gaming in a “safe” space with others who I already know share the interest. But before exploring that a little more, lets take a look at how role-playing games (RPGs) are treated in popular culture.
The scene in E.T. The Extra Terrestrial where Elliott interrupts his brother and his mates tabletop gaming
Dungeons & Dragons (D&D) is the most well-known face of RPGs, and it has popped up in popular film and culture for quite some time. Many will remember The Simpsons episode where Homer goes to college and is befriended by a group of nerds who play. He seemed to enjoy his foray into D&D, until he was slain by an elf, teaching us all a valuable lesson that you can never trust those self-righteous perfectionists! But before that, Spielberg featured D&D in an early scene in E.T. The Extra Terrestrial; where Elliott’s older brother is playing with his mates. Alice Cooper briefly played D&D in a cameo appearance on That 70’s Show, while more recent series like Stranger Things and The Big Bang Theory both feature role-playing games.
Don’t refresh your browser! That’s just the graphics from Space Quest 1
Notice the themes here? Nerd, Nerd, a brief non-nerd appearance by Alice Cooper, then more Nerd! But what people also might not realise is that there are some surprises in big-name celebrities who play or have played D&D or other RPGs, such as Moby, Vin Diesel, Mike Myers and Robin Williams. Many may also not understand the role that RPGs have played in shaping the modern day console gaming environment. I remember playing (very early) computer games like the Mines of Moria, based directly on Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings, where graphics were non-existent to the point where the dungeon, monsters and the character you played were all represented by keyboard letters, numbers or symbols on the screen in DOS style black and white/green! Then came the more advanced Hero Quest/Space Quest/Kings Quest series of games where graphics somewhat resembled Minecraft, except more two dimensional and not deliberately so! In these games, the player took on the role of a hero and had to solve puzzles and fight monsters to win the day; a pretty close resemblance to role playing games, brought to life on screen. From there, the games have exploded into the myriad of first-person shooter games, real-time strategy games and multiplayer online games. It is here where they have managed to step out of the “nerd” tag and become far more accepted as part of popular culture.
So why is it that (console) gaming has stepped beyond the “nerd” tag while (tabletop) gaming has retained that tag? And why is it that I have been worried about the nerd tag which has resulted in me choosing to be less vocal on that part of my life?
For me, it probably comes down to two key things in my formative years; my interest in sport and in girls! While I loved playing RPGs I’ve also always been very sporty, and played Australian Rules Foortball from around 15 onwards. I found it difficult to reconcile those two worlds as there didn’t seem to be a huge amount of overlap between them. I wasn’t confident my footy mates would relate to a story on how my Dwarven warrior-priest managed to take down a Mummy King, so I just didn’t talk about it with them at all. Of course, in hindsight I took away the opportunity for them to relate, or potentially to find out if any of them also had the dual interest in footy and RPGs!
And on the girl front, well, I didn’t know any girls through high-school and into my early twenties who seemed to have knowledge or interest in RPGs. It seemed to be a male dominated hobby and so again, I didn’t really see where my interest in girls overlapped with gaming. I struggled with confidence on that front enough as it was, without risking being labelled as a nerd and thus, forever struck from the list of date-able guys! Assuming I was ever on that list in the first place which, based on my lack of dating form in high-school, I was not.
Have sport console games like NBA 2K been responsible for making gaming cool?
But of course, both those fears have become self-fulfilling prophecies! I still don’t know many footballers or women who share my interest in RPGs, but that’s really because I haven’t put myself in a position to find out and meet any. I’ve never bridged the gap between the two in the same way online gaming has managed to. Online gaming’s expansion into the world of sport; think games like FIFA & NBA 2K22, have bridged the gap between supposedly “cool” sportspeople and the “nerdy” gamers so that the nerd tag has largely been erased from online gaming.
While RPGs probably still carry the nerd tag, for me I should take some confidence in the existence of huge pop-culture events like Supanova Pop Culture Expo, and the elevation of the nerd in series like Stranger Things and The Big Bang Theory. But more so, I know I just need to stop worrying about the tag of nerd in the first place! I don’t think that parcelling my interests into two separate boxes has served me well, so it’s well past time to embrace the nerd label!
Yes, that’s a Birthday cake that Vin Diesel had made!
Whether RPGs will label me a nerd or not, I’m committing to wearing whatever tag might come with it! Let’s face it, if Vin Diesel can get one of his D&D character names tattooed across his stomach, teach Judy Dench how to play D&D and have a birthday cake made in the form of a pile of D&D rule books, then I can too! Though to be fear, if you have Vin Diesel’s look and success then you can probably do whatever the hell you want and beware anyone who thinks to ridicule you! That non-withstanding, I’m going for it!
It would also be remiss of me to not take the opportunity to thank my two brothers and one of my best mates, Chez, for keeping me honest in this space. Having hobbies is super-important for good mental health, and role-playing and table-top games have brought me so much enjoyment over many, many years, have helped fuel my imagination, creativity and honed my problem-solving skills, all of which have contributed in hugely positive ways to both my work and my writing. I’ll be forever in debt to the enthusiasm and effort you have, and continue to apply along that road, so thank you!
If like me, you’ve been reluctant to share certain nerdy or other parts of yourself for fear of judgement and feel up for doing so, I’d love to hear about it, judgement free!